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Being a parent

5/1/2015

1 Comment

 
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From the moment we become parents we dream the lives of our children will be better than the lives we lived.  This is why as parents we drive them to and from a zillion activities, scrimping and saving, putting our lives on hold to further their opportunities.  We lecture them about the ways of life as they roll their eyes in the back seat of the car.  We charter them through their education so they can attend the Ivy League college we never had the opportunity to attend.  This is why we evaluate the performance of our own parents deciding “I can’t wait to do that with my own family” OR “I will never do that to my kids when I’m a parent!”

There are days like yesterday, that remind me what my true vision was for my children.  Days like yesterday when I witness my success as a parent.  Yesterday afternoon my daughter expressed her talent and courage, talent and courage I’ve never had to audition for an advanced choir.  Last evening while visiting a bathroom before his baseball game my son was disgusted by some white smoke left over from the drug use of the previous visitor.  When I take a moment and see my children as grown adults and recognize their small yet large actions, I can appreciate I have raised the kind of children I had always prayed for.

I silently snickered when my son worried about the possibility of failing a drug test from his brief encounter.  And I laughed out loud when he asked me if it was possible to become addicted from second hand drug smoke... But it was in that moment I realized I have raised some pretty remarkable children who were indeed listening to the messages I shared with them while they rolled eyes sitting in the back  seat of the car.

They are courageous and brave.  They are kind and loving.  They are responsible and trustworthy.  They are smart, talented and very, very funny.  They are beautiful human beings who have made me feel successful.

Being a parent is the hardest job we will ever have.  It evokes guilt, shame, worry, pride, angst, disappointment and hope.  By taking a small breath and a moment in time we will see the goal is not to create better lives for our kids than we had, it is to raise good people. 

While my kids may not be interested in receiving a doctorate from Harvard, they are the young adults I had always dreamed they would be.


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1 Comment
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4/5/2019 06:54:27 pm

It may be an unpopular opinion, but supporting your kids' desire regardless if the path they are going to take is in accordance with your desire for them or not is part of everything. I love the fact that you are open with your kids. You want them to learn on their own without sounding off to them. That's the right thing to do. As a parent, guidance is needed, but we don't need to tighten the belt just to make sure that they are going to be successful someday. When you give them enough trust that they can, they'll eventually achieve a lot of things in life!

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